Why It is OK for women to objectify men

Men objectify women. That is not a secret.

What is kept more on the hush-hush just among us girls is that women have always objectified men as well.

We drool over the butt of a hot celebrity just as sloppily as a man staring at Kim’s assets.

(Come on, my first celebrity crushes were Antonio Saboto Jr and Jean-Claude Van Damme. Talk about your gluteus maximus.)

And that’s ok.

Because they’re celebrities.

Why it is ok for females to objectify males.

Well, that’s how I justify it anyhow.

But there is a difference in how woman (or at least how I) objectifiy men.

  1. As I mentioned, I can only objectify celebrities. Never a real person that I have met in real life. Real people or, well, real people. Celebrities are characters. Even their social networking are carefully (or artlessly) plays for additional attention towards their brand.
  2. I am often in love with the character not the actor. Case in point, I find Hugh Laurie as Dr. Gregory House, M.D. extremely sexy. I know, I know, Dr. House is a bonafide ass. But an ass who can back his shit up and stands by his convictions. However, a couple of years ago, I saw Mr. Laurie giving an interview as himself and I felt…nothing. He is not his character and his character is not him.
  3. And going in the oppossite direction, finding out that the actor playing the character is not as great or, at least, redeemable, as the character can lower the appeal. I use to be all about Ian Somerholder and his character Damian on Vampire Diaries. That was, until he started being a public jerk with his breakup with co-star Nina Debrov. While he use to be a solid nine, he dropped down to, at best, a seven. And let’s not forget Brad Pitt. A perfect 10 if there ever was one. Until he not only got cheating (dropped him down to a 8) but was an ass about it (made him lose another 2 -3 points). He appears to have settled in to being a good husband and father so I find him about an eight again but, alas, unless a miracle happens, I don’t think that I will ever see him as a 10 again. He has become that guy. ~sigh~
  4. They need to be a good person. They need to be at least 51% good. Personally, I am only attracted to good guys. Even my bad boys have to be good guys, if that makes sense.  Heros get bonus points. However, I do see the appeal of the bad bad boy. Even though I couldn’t get into Sons of Anarchy, I can see why some women find them appealing.
  5. Here is a pivotal difference in male objectification of women. Rape. Or, at least allusion to forced copulation. Although I may (ahem) have mentioned that I would like to climb Joe Magnellio like a tree, I have never even thought take him, force him, or that I know he likes it rough. Yet, these are common themes in male objectification conversation. If I heard a girl talking like this, I would hope that I would shut it down and probably spurn the lady in question. However, boy’s tacitly agree with this sentiment by happily acknowledging it or by saying nothing at all.
  6. It is our turn. Sorry fellas if generations of your ancestors sucked up all your chances for it be socially acceptable for you to objective a woman. It wouldn’t have been so bad if they hadn’t leveled the playing field by adding a layer of oppression in the mix. Unfortunately, it will be generations before the male of the species has redeemed itself. Sorry. Not sorry.
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So, do you objectify men? Or Women? Or do you think that it absolutely 100% wrong.

2 comments to Why It is OK for women to objectify men

  • Male cover model

    As a male cover model who has just started his career in a small country, and thus coming from “the opposite side of the table” I agree mostly. Women tend to objectify celebrities and do not usually engage in the day-to-day objectification associated with the male gaze and female objectification. Also, as you say, women tend to care about the character and not just a body disconnected from his personality or behaviour. Security if of course important, and although I haven’t been published on front covers just yet, I’ve never felt insecure or threatened during the test photoshoots or any of the shirtless displays during book signing sessions.

    As for the last “entitlement” argument I can understand it’s tempting after decades of female objectification, but I’d say that@s not the reason but rather the symptom. What’s really happening, which seems to piss a lot of guys off, is that catering to the female gaze is more lucrative these days, due to a growing number of female professionals that are more willing than ever to spend money on books and entertainment. My manager says demand is growing and that she’ll probably be able to offer me a lot of photoshoots after the summer, to the extent that I can quit my day job and focus on modeling.
    At the same time, we’ve seen that the demand for many representations of the male gaze are disappearing such as the FHM magazine, or playboy with naked women. There’s still a lot of female objectification of course, but guys have fled from the printed “lad’s mags” to online, free porn, which of course has had an effect on offline and/or non-free imagery of clad women for guys.

      

    • Thanks for your very thorough comment. Quite thought provoking. Appealing to the female gaze is quite true as I am more likely to read a book with a cute guy as opposed to a female. On the other hand, when I see a female superhero in tight clothes, high heels, and boobs making a convenient bulls-eye on her chest, I am immediately taken out of the scene with a wth.

        

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