Never been first

I am having one of my rare melancholy moods where the tears just have to fall.

Sometimes it feels that I have never been anyone’s first choice.

Not in my youth.

Not in my marriage.

Not now.

Definitely not at this moment.

At this moment, I feel as if some of the pain just has to spill out in the form of tears just so I will have enough room to add more pain.

I am just glad that my children will forever know that there was at least one person who almost always put them first.

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Ah, well, still have one more child to finish raising.

Off to fake it till I make it.

We’ll just mark this off as a bout of post menstrual depression….

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